It is high time we have a Desi-Swadesi Oscar Awards in India, and quickly recognize the outstanding contribution of the myriad people who have made outstanding contributions to Films and Arts of India over the last few years. And like every Oscar show goes, this one will be awarded to the truly best of the best, no matter how obscure they are. Their effort shall be recognized, and truly appreciated.
Here are the award categories and the people who should win them.
Miss Gayab Award
Desi Award goes to an actor who has been missing from films for a long time.
And the award goes to…
Asin Thottumkal has worked in several blockbuster films across languages. Asin was last seen in the film “All is Well” released in 2015. In the year 2016, Asin married Micromax co-founder Rahul Sharma in a grand wedding and quit acting soon after. Asin and Rahul have a daugther Arin.
Most Bakbak Celeb ever:
No doubts in this one. Undoubtedly, the Desi Oscar for blabbermouth (literally) goes to…
Best Worst Fashion Award:
And the desi award goes to…
Beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder.
That is our defending argument when we say that what other people misconstrue as fashion, we label as ‘weird’. It’s just our opinion.
Most Dumb Actor Ever:
And the Desi Oscar for ‘dumbness that can never becoming annoying’ goes to….
On Round table with Rajeev Masand, Ananya Pandey became the poster child of lifelong struggle when she said that “her father was never in a Dharma film, he was never invited to Koffee with Karan….so she had my own struggle”. Thank God Siddhant Chaturvedi was there to shut her up.
Movie Change Boyfriend Change Award:
And the Swadeshi Oscar for the best Boyfriend turnover ability to score for a film goes to…
Link-up with Sushant Singh Rajput during Raabta, with Tiger Shroff during the shoot of Heropanti, and finally with Kartik Aaryan during the shoot of Luka Chuppi. Here is one gal who is proficient in the art of changing guys like she changes her clothes.
Aam Aurat Ki Awaaz Award:
And the Swadeshi Oscar for Aam Aurat Ki Awaaz Award goes to…
Rarely a formula in Bollywood strikes gold. But when it does, boy can the miners keep digging at the same place, hoping for more. Bhumi Pednekar’s girl next door persona was appreciated by critics and viewers alike, especially when she had gained a lot of weight for a role. And her acting talent had only helped.
But even after losing weight she can’t seem to shake off her girl-next-door persona. Even the filmmakers are dragging her through every small town based films, in every small-town girl roles.
Are Bhumi Madam, you are so talented! Now that you have enough successful films in your kitty, can you please move on to more varied and challenging roles?
Best Actor Female:
And the Swadeshi Oscar for the Best Actor Female goes to…
(Apne Kabir Bhai ki girlfriend hai yaar, award to banta hi hai)
Do you agree with the choices? If not, well, we really can’t do anything.